Hey dudes!

I experienced to move to a new state for graduate class the 2009 August (it actually was the sole class I managed to get into, thus I didn’t have a variety & I was truly distressed about being required to move up until now from my family & buddies) & found my now-ex date right from the start. He had been a joy of senior graduating in December & he fundamentally showed myself every little thing the town needed to offer/was my merely good friend for awhile (We have much more now & we joined a club on university so I guarantee I’m not wallowing by yourself during my room anymore) we felt a lot better about staying in an innovative new place caused by him, & felt like I was delivered truth be told there for reasons. We realized he was however method of hung-up about girl just who cheated on him 7 several months just before meeting myself. They’d dated for almost 36 months & kind of stayed together since neither had stayed on university; it absolutely was apparent that she had truly busted their heart, however when I inquired basically ended up being a rebound (that I performed ask twice because i am paranoid) he said however never go back to her after just what she did & that he’d hooked up together with other girls in between so those random hook ups were the rebounds, not me. He questioned us to end up being his gf about one month in & next was really thrilled for me personally to meet up with his family members. And I came across their ENTIRE family (both sets of grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, freakin neighbors). He was always down seriously to get together in public areas, we delivered him meal to his part-time work plenty, the guy ordered myself things, he solved my taillights, auto radiator, & my broken auto techniques. He additionally made most lasting strategies with me like spending a weekend together over summertime holiday during that theme playground in which the guy might get a totally free resort & discussed the way I will have to visit him every weekend once he graduated & moved out of town. One day, 8 weeks inside commitment, we visited a pumpkin patch where one of his true ex girlfriends buddies saw all of us with each other. His ex contacted him via another friends contact number (her very own number was actually clogged) & told him simply how much she however loved & skipped him. He failed to make an effort to cover the texts from me personally & review me all those things she had delivered. The guy seemed to truly enjoy the point that she ended up being obviously jealous, & I took pleasure involved, thinking that he was pleased & proud of being with me versus the lady. A short while later, situations got unusual & type of tense. She started arriving every where whenever we were out together, & as he noticed their, the guy got snappy with me for little silly things (one thing that bothered him was my driving & me personally not knowing the towns streets like um…obviously not i recently moved there) & the guy began obtaining quieter & quieter. One night the guy got a position offer an additional area about 40 minutes away, & for a passing fancy evening he crashed his bike which he had worked very difficult to fix up over the summer. That week-end was insane in my situation (being a grad student & all) and so I didn’t get to chat or see him much. Thereon Sunday the guy invited me to his grandparents supper to discuss if the guy should make the job or perhaps not. It was not the maximum amount of money as he ended up being aspiring to make, but one of his true cousins worked indeed there & encouraged him to go on it. I did too, since it was just 40 minute away from university & it actually was actually on the way house for me personally. I was thinking it actually was the world actually slipping into location. It had been evident, however, which he was not thrilled about “deciding” because of this work. I told him he didn’t have to go on it and that I was not wanting to stress him (I got split up with my ex from undergrad due to distance and shifting to further my own profession, so I totally realized their point-of-view), the guy could wait for lots more, or he might take it really for now & move on to much better situations later, but their family members wound up persuasive him. The guy seemed in a worse feeling after that, proclaiming that he had beenn’t producing future job decisions according to me personally. I tried to make it clear that I comprehended, & that I wasn’t planning to retain him if a fantastic possibility opened in which i really couldn’t follow. However, the work he got was at a place that i possibly could conveniently follow, and ended up being really kind of convenient for me personally. That next week, I experienced 2 huge assessments & couldn’t started to his destination to spend time, the actual fact that he had been texting about how precisely much the guy skipped myself & hoped i really could end up being indeed there. I finally emerged more than for an hour or so on Wednesday & since his back nonetheless injured from the bike collision, We introduced him hot candy. Every thing appeared typical & we began kissing, when he suddenly stopped & started watching the TV. I inquired him that was incorrect & he stated he had been wanting to know if we should always be together. Now recently have been HELL personally: I became in a big fight using my friends at home, my personal 16 yr old cat was sick, I decided I didn’t have any pals during my brand new program & I happened to be super lonely, etc etc etc. I had told him all of this in addition to my midterms that I was bringing the DAY UPON. Therefore naturally, i am upset as he claims this & as I calmly ask him exactly what the guy created the guy shrugged & said “I don’t know.” After attempting more to have him to elaborate, with him continuing to twiddle his thumbs, I calmly (I reiterate “calmly” because I didn’t yell, shout, cuss at him, or cry) kept his apartment & mentioned I got commit study. Afterwards that same evening, I labeled as & told him I became sorry for making & expected if the guy wished to talk 24 hours later. The guy said that he didn’t like to split up, but that I had simply found him a “side the guy did not realize about or like”. Today, again, I found myself the chilliest girl around whenever I remaining their apartment & I had actually absolutely nothing to apologize for. He decided to hook up once more after my personal examinations. So that the next evening, I-go back once again to their apartment in which he’s in a shittier state of mind compared to night prior to. And also this sucks, because i did not like to cry facing him, but I cried immediately following inquiring him point blank if the guy desired to split up beside me & he AGAIN stated “I am not sure, kind of”. Nonetheless it was not hysterical whining in any way & all I did after that was actually make an effort to get right to the root of the issue, because I actually WOULD NOT see this following and may not PICTURE located in that town without him, because I never had. For 4 hrs (during which he said he had beenn’t over his ex & he had had a significantly better experience of the girl than me – I reacted that we had not been dating for almost provided that & that it was foolish evaluate a 3-month relationship to a 3-year one; he repeated which he was only simply contemplating her, but could not return to her, hence the guy appreciated myself but don’t find it heading anyplace) he was wishy-washy with me until the guy at long last questioned us to leave very the guy could think about what the guy desired to do. We calmly remaining & after that texted him later on saying goodnight & that We hoped he felt better. Another morning, he texted to state he wished to break up UPON HE HAD MANY POSSIBILITIES TO SAY that TO our FACE. Anyhow, for 3 months we style of straight back & forth texted & fought with one another, beside me usually initiating it. Several days following separation I informed him how much cash we missed him & failed to know very well what occurred. We never ever begged for him back, all I asked him for had been closure and answers. He was very emotionally disconnected which smashed my personal heart & forced me to incredibly discouraged. I was in a very poor location & for 2 months would text him each time I got depressed and hopeless to tell him just what a jerk he had been for me, not one which the guy previously responded to. Sooner or later i came across me in a better spot over winter months break & texted him stating sorry for all that we said & that we forgave him also & hoped the guy loved their new job. Again, never ever texted straight back & blocked me on Snapchat (no place else though that is strange). Today, I haven’t texted him for just a little over per month & this guy provides little to no social media existence, I never friended any one of his loved ones on Facebook, & we merely met like 4 of their friends that happen to be all finished now. We social-media stalked the ex which cheated on him & We see they never ever got in with each other. Like I mentioned before I produced brand new buddies & went around & flirted with other guys since this. I have concentrated on my personal researches, getting nearer to God, & ya girl actually had gotten a boob task over break, but i cannot prevent contemplating him, i truly believed he had been the one. We were appropriate in a lot of techniques and liked most of the exact same things, but he swore up & down that people were not connecting (he explained before that he has actually attachment issues because their parents abused him, therefore I get that he does not connect with individuals as quickly when I would). It seems also weirder as it’s like I’m residing in their hometown, that’s nevertheless rather foreign for me. Literallllly men, precisely what do I do???